Don't Be Scammed

"Everyone complains about a lack of money, but none complains about a lack of brains."

-My Jewish Grandmother.

Here is a list of typical services and their fees (and some free advice):

1) Consultant: $650 to $850 a day. (Anymore than this, check their ego)

2) Auditor: Inexperienced: $650 a day (Feed the person lunch)

3) Auditor: Experienced: $950 a day (Better get a good score)

4) Non-GFSI Inspector: Inexperienced: $450 to $650 a day

5) Training Person: $450 per day and one red apple

6) Travel fee for doing nothing but riding all day: None (Add one tube of Preparation H)

7) Per Diem: Pay it if only you are working with the government.

8) Travel Cost: Direct exact cost of planes, cars, motel and taxi's.

9) If you pay travel costs plus per diem, have your head checked.

10) Meals: No one eats over $40.00 per day - if that much. Request receipts if more is asked for (and a "To Go Box")

11) Incidentals: What incidentals? (That's what you carry in your suitcase, right!?)

12) Cell phone cost: Really?

13) Parking cost: Maybe

14) Drinks at the bar: No way (unless you invite me)

15) Hotel: Does it cost more than a Holiday Inn: Justify. (What the heck are they doing in their room anyway?)

16) Rental cars: DO NOT PAY for insurance or prepaid gas. (If its a Tesla, really don't prepay for gas.)

17) Tips: Here's a tip, you don't reimburse for tips.

18) Airline cost: Don't fall for the high cost of flying. Compare.

My Jewish grandmother also said, "A fool is born and always sits in the White House."

The font of useless guidance,

Karl